"...to thine own self be true."

Hamlet

I was supposed to meet you
I was supposed to smell you
I was supposed to feel you
I was supposed to leave you

I’m supposed to abandon me…..

Start eating at 4:00 am,
I get tones of dirty dishes in the mornings
I’m happy; guess the reason is my new nail polish
Everybody’s asleep
That’s when I get cold
I pause the movie and get my dark navy jacket
It’s almost the midsummer
No dreams come to mine mind!
William’s on vocation, he said he’s gonna try Hawaii
Good for him, he needs some sun!
Clarissa’s here, she says she like my jacket and that my hair’s too fizzy!
Keep on dreaming Clarissa,
I’ll count the sheeps twice!

Oh, it'll take a little time,
might take a little crime
to come undone now
.......
Chill, is it something real
Or the magic I'm feeding off your fingers
......
We'll try to stay blind
to the hope and fear outside
Hey child, stay wilder than the wind
And blow me in to cry
.......

i think i'm going real crazy this time....

همه (!) رفتن عروسی..منم باید برم .باید منم ماتیک بزنم،موهای وحشیمو آروم کنم
و به همه آدمایی که میبینم لبخند بزنم تا ببینند که چقدر خوشحال و شادم
پس چرا نشستم اینجا و دارم زارمیزنم؟
این یک سوال ساده است.
کلاریسا،تو میدونی چرا،نه؟

Having watched the Bitter Moon
I’m sitting here, gazing at the monitor for I don’t know how long!

Please be a sexaholic
Please be unpredictably miserable
Please be self absorbed much (not the good kind)
Please be addicted to some substance

Making the coffee bitterer everyday
Reading more and more everyday
Trying to laugh out louder everyday
Knowing Clarissa better everyday
Melting more in the feminine side everyday
------------------
I'm beginning to "BE"...and it feels strange!
Could you pass me those forks over there?
Clarissa....wake up! I need the forks...

You left me at 4 pm today.
Sorry, but I’m not sure I’m gonna miss you.
And I’m neither sure if I wanna even try to...
I think I’ll better keep the memory, even though I know I wouldn’t check it much…
Immaculate dream….that’s what I want…you don’t serve it here, right chef?
Clarissa, let’s go…they don’t serve it here…
Do you feel like nightlife tonight Clarissa?
Do you need some air?
Here you are my dearest host, ain’t it like a déjà vu Clarissa?
You've heard this before, right?

..I’ve got so much to tell you about where I have been
what am I suppose to say?
How am I supposed to feel?
Why do you have to be so pretty?
Why do I float between wanting you and not wanting you?
Why do I feel such lonely?
Close the door when you leave.
I want you to leave...
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Clarissa...wake up, he’s gone...