It is a strange sort of pain "to die of yearning for something you'll never experience"

Monday, December 02, 2002

me, concepts and insatiablity
i felt desperate today as i was watching my freind talking about her project,i felt terribly desperate!
where the hell i'm going to?
seems that my concepts of life have been fade away.
who am i? skinny little nobody! no past and no future!
i don't even have the courage to admit it! i write it here because i know,no one will read it,except few people.maybe 2 or 3.
i drift into the strangest dreams Of youthful follies and changing teams
i gotta Admit i'm wrong, oh, no, not yet
Then i wake up and remember that i can't forget !!!
i even forget to remember what my concepts were!!!!!
i look around,every body's doing something, not me! what i do is just to get up everyday,go to univercity without even knowing a damn thing about what i'm learning(i don't even learn anything cuz i donno shit about it!)...wasting time, that's what i'm doing with my life,which through the concepts supposed to be a image of a insatiable hunger to explore,to run, to laugh,to love........
the only insatiable thing here is wanting love.which, we all know ,can't be caught!
so, here's what i'm gonna do....close this damn window,shut this monster down and go to bed,hoping that i'd dream.insatiablity hoping!

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